Editorial: Discover Card! You're Pre-Approved To Kiss My Ass

I recall that I fell for this twice when I was in college and didn't even have a job. I was pre-approved because of my unique ability to breath, grasp merchandise with my opposable digits, and walk them to a cashier. I'm still making minimum payments for all that beer you "loaned" me.

You made me feel soooo special with your "student" credit card. Well, believe me, the student is now the master. I've been eating beans all week, and now it's time for you to face the music.

Thanks, but no thanks. Don't think you can lock me into a lifetime of minimum payments for the short term pleasure of an impulse purchase. Frankly I'm disgusted that you'd ... even .... Whoa! Look at that Franklin Mint Star Trek chess set on the HSN. Discover, I hope you'll excuse my rash words. Where do I sign?